...I really don't want to do this.
I know you put a lot of effort into that but really? Are you that fucking anal?
I haven't earned anything here? Fuck you. Your front office called me to come to that stupid tournament. Then one of your boys sticks his head in my business. I was going to do a class act Gary. I was going to win the world title. Then I was going to let all comers come at me. When I lost. I was going to leave. I would have done SFT a solid.
Then this place took a solid on me.
Now the shit is going to hit you in the face for the rest of your career here. Don't worry. It won't be long the way I keep seeing things going. You enjoy hanging with “Tiger Blood”. You're Bitter? Fuck you! You don't know shit about what all I have had to go through to get as good as I am. You never fucking will either. You want to talk shit about how you are some great band and I'm that fucker who just hits the right note with the tweens on reality television. Fucker you don't know reality. All you know is wrestling.
This isn't reality Gary. It's a fucking show. You're getting older. Then do something about it and put me in my place or are you going to get someone else to help you! That's the only way you did get one up one me, but I am not going to dwell on it Gary. I am going to move past it because hell all this is. All this ever was. Is just to add spice to the match. Jesus. You taking this so personally like I pissed in your eye or something.
That's it isn't it? Did you intend to offend but really just get mad? U Mad? You can dish it out, but you can't fucking take it can you! Your pathetic. You want to call my talent and ability into question? Heh. You should really watch some CWF before you start talking shit about me. I watched everything Gary. I watched your first match all the way to your last one. I fucking studied. Sure, I get handed title shots left and right. Not once. Not. One. Fucking. Time. Have I asked for one. I don't want your world title Gary.
I want it burned!
You still don't grasp this. This isn't about you. None of this is about you. This is about your federation. This is about doing the right thing. Hell I know that, and I am the one laughing at it. Don't try to make yourself out to be the victim here Gary. You brought down the wrath of the “Axis” on yourself.
So stop bitching and take it like a man!
You want to be remembered? Then stop bitching and prove it! You can do that can't you! You can still do it you pathetic pile of pruned out puss! Come on! Hit me old man! Show me what I need to learn! You want me to get off your lawn you old fuck! Come on! Hit me! HIT ME YOU SON OF ILLITERATE IMBICILE!
Hit me as hard as you fucking can Gary...
I will still stand.
I will still. Get. The. Fuck. UP!
I don't think I am better than you. I know I am. What do you think of that? I know I am better than all of the crap that you could ever pull. I am the best of the best because nothing changes my path. Wins. Losses. Ties. Don't fucking matter. I get up. I laugh it off. Life out there is such a pain in the ass man that nothing in that ring will ever ruin my fucking high!
Come on Gary. What's really getting your old man pants tight?
Gary. You want to talk about hunger, desire, and all that bullshit. Let me tell you what you will see when you look into my eyes. It isn't about beating you. It isn't about proving you wrong. This match is about one thing. Shutting you the hell up! Either by pinning one of the other tag team, or by doing what you think is impossible. I don't want to pin Kyle. I don't want to pin Josh. I don't give a fuck if I ever get a win over Deuce. It's you.
If I don't get it though Gary. I still win. Because I still steal the whole fucking show. I've earned every damn thing I've gotten. You wanna spit in my face about my legacy. I got news for you. In fifty years. No one will remember who the fuck you were. You are forgettable Gary. Me. You will always remember Ataxia. I guarantee it.
I did call Nirvana and Dawn. I asked them what it was like to be in the ring with perfection.
They told me.
They loved wrestling me.
Because I am perfect because you can't beat me Gary.
You don't believe in...okay? Seriously? Are you just pitching that because it's an election year because I'm gonna be honest. That sucks. That's the worst end line for a segment in a promo I have seen since Lionel's last promo.
Get a better writer dude.
Oh. I'm a cunt. Grand Canyon to Pot Hole. You've been a dick to everyone and you can't take it being thrown back at you? Seriously. Grow up ya troll. You're that kid with the cut and pasted image tag on a forum that says “U MAD”. Come on old man. Where is your respect? Oh, I haven't earned it? I contradict myself? What do you think you've been doing since you started? I beat the whole Axis BY MYSELF! Which you didn't.
So I called a spade a spade. Get over it.
OH! So NOW! Wins and losses don't matter. So then your going to pull that line and the eleventh hour? Right before you know you done fucked up! Legend didn't care? Good. I didn't either. You guys were the ones talking about this and that and all this respect shit. You come into my match and beat me up to prove what point? That three guys can drag a guy out of a ring and toss him into some steps. Wow. It's almost funny if it wasn't so pathetic. Oh hell I'll laugh anyway just to pity you.
Ha...Ha...Oh I can't. You get enough that whenever your wife see's your dick.
Oh shit did I go there? Yeah. And you can't say anything back? Aww. Dirty Trick! Dirty! Dirty! Bad Taxi.
Oh your comment about my dad I agree with you.
Because being a splooge mark is better than living in a world with you!
My father was a bastard. I'm glad he's not around. I'm glad he's not around to see me as a success. There. There is a clue Gary. Congrats I just made your whole promo worthwhile because no one gives a fuck about you! I just saved your ass again. You did this as a favor. Bullshit. You came back begging because they wouldn't put up with your bullshit in that other fed. You want to talk trash about me? Do some fucking research because I did mine.
And I found out you are a sad pathetic old man clinging to your spot as top dawg. You won your first world title in three months. I won mine in two! Wanna play this game. I know a kid who won his first world title at the age of fifteen! You still suck! Nothing you say matters. There is always someone out there better than you. I accepted that. You haven't yet. No worries. No footage to make you have to fess up to your lies.
Ego stroke this ego stroke that. I don't give a fuck about you Gary. You are my opponent. You talked trash. I gave it back to you. Same as this. Next week. I ignore you again. Because you will go away. You will run and hide. You will not make a fucking difference. You want to go on and on and space out your promos with breath's longer than mine ever were then go right the fuck ahead. This is over and you know it. It's part of the game. It isn't the whole game. Wins and losses are not done by promos. I'm paraphrasing your own stablemate. Get the fucking clue yet?
ARGH! Why do I even bother trying to explain my philosphy to you. It isn't about reality! This isn't real! This is wrestling! It's fucking predictable. Just like you not getting it. Hitler lost. Yay. Did he win at some way. Yeah. What? Yeah. Think about what you said. History is not about what's right Gary. It's about whose left. The winners write the history books but those who look for the truth know that it's not that fucking simple.
I beat you you can't say anything to me nyeh nyeh nyeh!
You sound like that. This is you all the fucking time. And you decide to give me a doctoral thesis on why I am wrong. Tell me something.
Was it my goal to get you this frustrated the whole time?
Good pawn. Good boy. Here's your treat.
Yeah I am so threatened by you. I won't even attack you I am so threatened. Who the fuck are you? Some whiny ass grandpa whose lost his damn mind trying to win this war of the words with...nobody.
No one who matters.
No one respectable.
Someone who has better things to do than listen to you. I'm a cunt after all why do you care about what I think? Why do you care about what I say. You knocked a whole promo centered pretty much on me. You did exactly what you said I did. I talked about Ace and the other tag team pretty extensively. I just found a break talking about you so I could put in my scene. Blame my editing skills for giving you a bad idea. You want to call me unoriginal. Fine. I am unoriginal. I don't care! You aren't either! “I haven't been pinned or tapped out in nine months.” Yeah. Elsewhere. Some other indy fed. Some other pile of shit that doesn't matter just like SFT.
Has it not dawned on you yet?
You don't fucking matter.
This isn't about you Gary. This is about one thing.
Me. Getting what I want.
Which either way I do.
So enjoy your little tirade. Smile up until the moment when all the trashtalk is done. You are pulling double duty and being sick. Gee. I wonder what excuse you'll have this time when you finally do lose Gary.
Because remember. I don't have to pin you.
I just have to make sure you don't win.
And even if I lose Gary.
I still win. Now go drink your Ensure.
You just might need it. HAHAHAHAHAHAAH...