~So don't cry to me ohhh baby. Your future is in a Oblong Box!~

"Go to sleep bitch. Die motherfucker die." Go to Sleep. Eminem

Ataxia: Shhh. It's okay Darling. Your beloved isn't going to let anyone else take you again.

{We fade in on Ataxia holding the CWF Impact Title again. We are in the “Freak Show” tent again with the green lights and horrible tent backdrop. This time though we notices that through the bag mask Ataxia is wearing...blue eyeshadow and long lashes?}

Ataxia: Hello Danny Boy. Are we slightly miffed at little old me. Sorry about the parlor tricks but I had to get everyone's attention. You understand, of course, because you know your not really the Impact Champion. They took your chance to be undisputed when they had me clean up their mess in the world title tournament. I had no desire to be Gamble's little champion so I'll admit it. I slacked off in my match with Blue Scorpion on purpose. Why? Because I don't want to be the world champion of the Gamble Error of CWF. So I deliberately lost. Oh, it wasn't to far fetched but that does put a little doubt into the minds of everyone about just how good Scorpio really is. If I hadn't held back would he be world champion. I am already a former world champion. I do not need to prove myself yet again in that arena. I came in here to do one thing. Win my darling for daddy.

{We pan out a bit and we see Ataxia wearing a rendition of Dr. Frankenfurter's costume from 'Rocky Horror Picture Show' except instead of bare flesh showing we are greated with a full black mesh that hides and details about who Ataxia is like tattoo's or scars.}

Ataxia: So because of Steven Gamble you can bet you are in this position. The fucking fool actually fell for everything hook, line, and sinker. Now there is just you. You, who couldn't beat me when I took your title in the first place. Only when Gamble threatened me did you get it back. Couldn't even come and fight me for it like a real man? Oh how “The Hammer” hath fallen. “Big Bad” Gamble had to get it back for you. It's nice to know since this place closed down you've become an even bigger pussy than before. Then again you are what you eat. Wait. I forgot your woman did have a bigger dick than you. Silly me. AAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

{Ataxia caresses himself as he puts the belt on over his waist. Taking special care to rub it with his crotch area.}

Ataxia: Oh don't worry. No one really expects you to do anything spectacular with your life. After all you are from Australia. Descendents of Criminals. So bad and stupid the Brits sent you to your own continent just to be rid of you. Funny how the world works doesn't it Dan? Your people don't deserve to compete in this great sport of ours but I guess if we have stars like the Tully's then we can have criminals in pro wrestling. Oh am I getting that old “highlander temper” up? Oh I hope so. After all you do have that sharp tongue that got you into how many fights as a child Dan? How many times has running your mouth gotten you into a situation where you mouth cashed a check your ass couldn't cover. Be very...Very careful what the hell you say to me you insignif-cunt little shit. I'm not going to play nice with you. This isn't some karate match that Yuri Markov is going to be able to coach you through like in the final round of a fucking Rocky movie. This is a match with me.

{This is when Ataxia snaps his fingers like a black woman and even does his next rant in the voice of a sista.}

Ataxia: Which means that you have nothing. I have everything Dan. I have your belt. I have the strategy. I have the power...HE-MAN! I have the ability. I have the edge. What do you have? A shitty accent and no fucking way to beat me. Oh sure you got your kicks. Ohhh. Yay kneecap busting day. It's better than weasel stomping day in my opinion because it's every day of the year as long as I have a crowbar. Oh wait. I'm suppose to play fair with this encounter right? Silly me.

{Ataxia smiles with his blood red teeth as we pan into his face.}

Ataxia: You seem to be under the impression that anything in this match actually matters to me. Oh sure the title would be nice but I get to make you my bitch. Tell me. How are you going to handle it when I do to you what you did to Angel at ReAwakening? Oh, I bet we will learn not to stick our tongues down the wrong people's throats again will we. Yeah, I'm threatening to do it right? Wrong. I'm going to do it. For two reasons. One it makes you uncomfortable and two the fines that the FCC will give to dear Mr. Gamble will definitely make it worth my time to do it. It'll be so cute to see him get fined for what his employee's do. Also if he protests it all I have to do is say discrimination and I shut this damn place down. That's right Dan. In order to save CWF your mainly image is going down the toilet. No worries. I'm sure Caledonia will definitely find a better man. I mean she's been fucking a little boy all these years I guess that anyone with a one inch prick will be a improvement over you. “Ataxia is fishing.” Wrong! I'm pointing out that I can take everything from you. Hell, I can set you on fire again.

{Ataxia holds up the lighter and flicks it on. He crosses his eyes and smiles as he starts rubbing himself off camera.}

Ataxia: Oh. That. Was. Like. Christmas! Oh the orgasmic joy that you gave me was truly a sight to behold. To change my pants afterward made me feel like a dirty little boy. Oh Danny. You just complete me more than any other opponent. I plan on just doing oh so many dirty things to you. Just like you like to do to all those girls Dan. Just like you would like to do to Caledonia. I'm about to become the new love of your life.

{We hear something vibrating off camera. We pan back to midview as we see Ataxia holding up a bright fushcia dildo with Dan Higlander scratched into it.}

Ataxia: I have watched every match of yours I could get my hands on. I love jerking off to how you fight. It really just makes me feel so damn hot for you. I might just hump your leg Dan. It also shows me just what I need to do to beat you. See, I knew you could take out Strong, Angel, Quinn, and especially Billy Anderson. I know that it was going to be you and I after I took you down. The mist and the fireball. Ohh. That was just the icing on the cake. Maybe if you paid attention to the guy holding your title instead of rather or not Alex Cain gives you any “bromance” time you might still have this belt.

{Ataxia spanks his ass as we start hearing “X Gonna give it to ya” by DMX start to play.}

Ataxia: Tax gonna give it to ya. Knock knock. Open up the door it's real. My dick's going in your ear to make you squeal. Get hard with my man parts. Thinking about taking a bite out of Dan's heart. I'll make this mother fucker wonder what he did Damn right and I'll sodomize him again. Cause I am right and I will win. Break a hole in his throat and I'll fuck that till he god damn chokes. I'm not playing around but I'll take him to the bad side of town. Take him to Fredrick's of Hollywood and dress him uptown. Please, The only thing Dan does is play and I'm going to make sure Dan get's laid! {Ataxia girates with the large dildo and smacks himself with it in the face.}

Ataxia: First I'm gonna DROP! My pants on the GROUND. Then I'll stick in with a POP! NEVER LET GO! Tax gonna give it to ya. Tax gonna give it to ya. Tax gonna give it to ya. He gonna give it to ya.

{Ataxia spins the dildo like a baton in the air.}

Ataxia: Aint never gave nothing to me but everytime I turn around Dan's wanting to take my rightful title from me. So I aint gonna let him take it so I'm going to stick something is his ear so he'll understand it. You against me, me against you Whatever, whenever What the fuck you gon do?I'm a bag faced rapist whose gonna take your cherry. Then I'm gonna give you to some pedophile named Larry. You wanna fight me boy your going to have to face fear. And I'm going to do the Buffalo Bill dance to give you tears.

{Ataxia starts walking around the tent and we see pictures of Dan Highlander all smiling except for something that looks like elmer's glue all over the face of the pictures.}

Ataxia: First I'm gonna DROP! My pants on the GROUND. Then I'll stick in with a POP! NEVER LET GO! Tax gonna give it to ya. Tax gonna give it to ya. Tax gonna give it to ya. He gonna give it to ya.

{Ataxia walks behind a screen and we see his clothes start flying off of him but thankfully not him naked.}

Ataxia:Aiiyo where my freaks at?! I know I got them down in the game Give em love and they give it back Talk too much for too long Don't worry Aussie. Crocodile Dundee will help you wear the thong. You'll say that's a knife and I'll say No, that's a knife and when I cut you with it. Your ass gonna cry!

{We hear the vibrating stop as Ataxia throws all of the “Rocky” gear over the side of the screen.}

Ataxia: First I'm gonna DROP! My pants on the GROUND. Then I'll stick in with a POP! NEVER LET GO! Tax gonna give it to ya. Tax gonna give it to ya. Tax gonna give it to ya. He gonna give it to ya.

{Ataxia comes out with the belt affixed to his pants. He is wearing his typical suit and tie outfit that he always wears to the ring including his black opera gloves.}

Ataxia: I know something you don't know. I have tales of your damn woe. I'm going to make you wish to God you had stayed in Sydney's docks. I'm going to rape your face and make you look like a disgrace. That's okay. That's all right. I'm going to make you my bitch Tuesday Night! You can't win. You can't succeed. I'm going to take you on your knee's. Everything about you fucking sucks. Don't worry I won't make you gargle my nuts. That's just fine. It's just grand. I'm going to whack off to you with barbwire on my hands. I'm not crazy. I'm not nuts. I'm just a little fucking yutz. I'm the one you have a reckoning with. Your gonna wish someone else could take your place because I'm going to do things to make you waste. I'm going to make you consider a career change. I'm going to dress you in a wedding dress and tickle your elmo. Even if you scream at me and yell HELL NO! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAHA...

{Ataxia suddenly stops and then grabs the camera and forces it to just focus on his red teeth and crusty lips.}

Ataxia:Ohh I loved the puppet. I mean it's like I never have used a puppet before.

Mr. Screwyou: Fuck off!

Ataxia: Yeah I am not going to even dignify him with a on screen shot. Look. I think it's cute that you and Shawn are doing the whole comedy routine but he's about to become Jason Todd, aka Robin Number Two. I wouldn't worry about what I am going to do to you. I mean I could take care of Caledonia if you want. You know the old skull fuck. That could be fun wouldn't it? Or, I could do that to Shane. I think he'd like that. There is no amount of security that is going to keep you from getting your ass handed to you by me you pretentious son of a bitch. By the way the Kenny voice was orignal back in like ninety nine. Seriously kid. Grow the fuck up and get ready to taste my hot rod.

{Ataxia tosses the camera back and we see that Ataxia has a wall of televisions all showing different scenes of Dan Highlander promos and wrestling matches.}

Ataxia: Rip off of some Batman Villain? Well, considering that you are trying really hard to get a rouge's gallery hero then maybe just maybe you'd like someone on that level. Oh, Darling you seem to think that your not the only notch in my bedpost. I can't wait to have a good fuck with you and then realize, just like every other federation out there, that you are passe. How many belts have I taken off of you without Chance Stevens. Oh yeah. THIS ONE A FEW WEEKS AGO YA FUCKING IDIOT! God, why did you make Australians so fucking stupid...oh yeah...kangaroo fuckers. Got cha. Thanks G-Dawg. We tight. Seriously you don't think that someone hasn't done something like that before. I got news for you. We all know I am faking this. We all know I am making fun of the gimmick that you are attempting to ramrod me into. Let's be queer...I mean clear about this. You can hire whomever you think can kick my ass and I know for a fucking fact I will still get the upper hand. You are worried about Chance. Funny story. I haven't heard from him all week. He may not even fucking show. Storm. Storm's got BS to deal with, literally. So it's just going to be me and you. Man to Wannabe. You want to know what kind of man I am Dan? How about a man who doesn't forget who gave him his shot. How about a man who doesn't jerk back into CWF with some idiot fan boy who can't tell a wristlock from a wrist watch?! How about a man who knows that the man running this looney bin is more nutty than me! How about the man who is going to kick your ass then take your manhood in his hands and twist it just to prove to the world that Dan Highlander actually has some fucking balls! I think you can play with the other eunichs in the Paramount division, a subsidiary of suckage curtain jerking, which is where YOU belong. Gamble took me out of your fucking match because he knew I would beat you! He knew I would become the Impact Champion! Why the fuck would I want his pathetic world title Dan when I can make a belt actually mean something. The Impact Champion has to be willing to defend that thing in any situation. You can't fucking do it. You can beat Angel...Ohhh yeah beat up a women with a blown out knee cap. Yeah. You love to beat up women Dan but what are you going to do when someone is going to make out with you in the ring. OHHHHH! Then where your fucking bodyguards can't save you from my wrath let's see how you deal with me.

{Ataxia takes off the belt and holds it up and kisses it.}

Ataxia: You want to call me out? Get your fucking facts cleared up Dan. You are going to feel my anger! You got what was meant to be mine. Now, I am going to take what is mine from you and then the only thing you can say Dan is that you were a champion that mattered for a brief amount of time. I sent Gamble a tape of your australian redneck gimmick. I think he might want to team you up and make you Bubba Anderson after I get through kicking your ass this week. Hell. I don't need to bring Ryan Storm to ringside. I don't need to be Chance Stevens to my corner. All I gotta do is this.

{Ataxia holds up his cellphone and it says Call: Alex Cain.}

Ataxia: All I got to do is call the big man to come down to the ringside area and watch you crap your fucking pants! I don't have to do anything to get into your head other than point this out to you. You don't know who the fuck I am or what I am capable of. I beat Cain. Something you haven't done yet! At least I didn't tie with Elisha. Remember him Dan. Remember who beat him clean? Me! You want to fight the real fucking monster of CWF let me ask you this. Just how safe can you make those close to you? Just how secure are you in me not going after someone you really care about. Maybe I'll go find Caledonia and give her a roofie chloroform sandwich. Maybe I'll make a video and show you how to really fuck a woman since you fail at it so much. Maybe I'll just rape her face literally just so that pretty girl you like will be paperbag worthy for the rest of her pathetic life of being the “love” of your life Dan.

{Ataxia walks over to a lifesize doll of Caledonia. She's completely nude with no real details that can be seen but there are two censor signs over certain areas that the kiddies can't watch.}

Ataxia: Still think I'm fucking with you. Do you really think the only way I can hurt you is to attack you from behind. No. The best way to hurt someone is to make them fuck up.

{Ataxia gets behind the dummy of Caledonia and strokes her hair. We pan to his face as we hear his pants unzip.}

Ataxia: Your reckoning for your betrayal of my father will not only cost you your title Dan “The Hammer” Highlander. It will cost you your manly persona you flaunt to cover up the fear that you have of people seeing you as Dan Highlander, a scared little boy who can't fight what his mouth speaks of, instead of “The Hammer”. I'm going to take everything from you...Darling. Maybe then you'll learn your lesson...AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

{Fade to Gray...}