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"You're my sinner. You're my dinner. My little puppet, let's pretend. You're the cure to my affliction. My addiction to the end." I am the Spider. Alice Cooper.
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We can talk about what this really is about now right?
Not to be mean Danny, but the people need to know. They see you as the conquering hero. The “Voice of Authority” in CWF. The one who will finally bring down Ataxia. All three...are a load of bullshit.
“The Ripper” is the hero? Please. “The Ripper” is a coward. “The Ripper” is a loser. “The Ripper” belongs in a dress doing tricks. I took you out because it needed to happen. There is not going to be a apology or any justification about it. That night you lost your shot at the CWF World Title and I put you out of your own fucking misery. You had nothing left to prove. You had no goals. You had no reason to stay. “But I was popular”. Fuck you. These fickle fucking fans fucking hated your fucking guts man. The truth is...I made you what you are. Without me in that match at Redemption... “The Ripper” would still be the other guy in the tag team world of CWF. Without a great opponent like me and Jace you wouldn't have had any heat in the new CWF. So since I made you...I got rid of you.
Why? Why Ataxia why?
Because it needed to be done. You weren't a threat you were a waste of time. Then the best part. The best part is after I took you out. You become this whiny little bitch. I loved every second of seeing your true colors Danny. Yellow.
Anubis comes back. I retired his ass and not even a fuck you from you. Your “old buddy” comes back and you stay hidden. Driving cars. Trying to lead a normal life, but you can't. You want the spotlight, not because you earned it, but because you are what everyone always accused me of. You. Danny “The Ripper” B...are a attention whore.
So when you finally come back what do you do? Challenge me right then and there to a match of this magnitude. No. You come in. Get a cheap pop. Interfere in MY match. And you didn't expect me to embarrass you?
I could never embarrass you Danny...God already did that when your mom hatched you all those years ago.
But damn if you didn't look cute looking like the bitch I know you to be. Priceless.
That didn't even piss you off. No. You wait till Gamble needs another loser to come after me to take this job. This job that you have used to methodically “attempt” to take me out. Changing the stips to a table match. Good job. I still walked out just fucking dandy. Hell I danced all the way past your office with a nice fuck you and fuck ANOOBIS to. Then you throw me at the world champion! The man who just debuted the out of work Australian Stable in CWF. The man who needed a easy win to have any credit as World Champion.
You threw him to his greatest rival since this place reopened. You spoiled a main event of a pay per view just to give me a dose of humility. Then I win...
Man, it must really suck to see just how much of a fucking poor planner you are.
I've already beat you Danny because we all know I can still cut it. A “Tower Match”! Oh no! Ataxia hasn't done one of those! Ataxia can't beat “The Ripper” in a Tower Match!
I don't have to beat you. I just have to end you. Truth be told trying to save Gamble is fucking over this company more than what I could do. Trent Steel is going to drive this fucking cesspool into the dirt all because of your ego Danny. If that match doesn't happen. Everything. Every damn thing that has my name on it...including this lovely match you have put me in. All that copyright money has to be paid to Trent Steel PLUS damages. This company can't survive that.
You just killed CWF if you win.
Not like you actually care...you just want your pride salivated.
Has it not dawned on you yet that even if I lose I still win. Let's look at exactly what's going to happen if I win. I get to be commish for a week and I get to make whatever match I want. Meaning I can screw over every little fucking person that has ever made me want to take a shotgun to my face for having to listen to the idiotic dialogue that makes up the so called promos of CWF. The Hardkore Warriors, The Four Outback Steakhouse Waiters, and Synn Deville should really be afraid. Then what am I going to do to you Danny? What am I going to do to pay you back for failing at fucking with me? I'll already tell you exactly what's going to happen. I'm going to give you a actual match that will prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that you are still a worthless pile of shit wrestler.
I got just the stipulation for you. You're going to want to kill yourself.
Then again I think you already do.
Humility is the one thing that makes you really fucking focused doesn't it. You got humbled when CWF reopened and they took your title from you. Then you go and lose your shot. Like you said in your promo. No purpose. You knew you would have to wait to get your shot because whomever came in second was going to be the number one contender. It was going to be a long hard road for you to get what you wanted. Truth be told I knew what needed to be done to save CWF...
I had to give you purpose again.
Let's pause this “problem” you have with me for a moment.
You say eventually you're going for the world title again. That's funny. You've moved so far back into your mindset of “The Ripper” I can not help, but laugh at how easy it was to get you right where I wanted. See...the truth is...It wasn't suppose to be you.
I was going to take out Blue.
See I had a feeling the winner of that match was going to take it all. Call it a gut feeling but it was the “hero” match. With how well you and I both knew Jace it's hard to deny he would have made it into the finals. Then whoa and behold.
You lost.
I was shocked for a moment because truthfully I was more looking forward to tormenting you for months to come giving this place it's true heroic comeback it deserved. Then, kind of like how I lost to you, you lost to Blue. I still needed someone to fulfill a role so sadly it had to be you.
Guess you just had a really fucking bad day. I had one of those once to.
No it wasn't the day you beat me for the title either. Despite what you think, Danny, I am not that egotistical. Matter of fact I will be the first to admit you beat me fair and square. Despite what you think of me being a “coward”. I am someone who will admit my faults. I'm psychotic, neurotic, and damn right a fucking manipulative bastard. I am no coward...and also Danny...I am not self obsessed.
If anything I've given up everything for CWF. Do you remember during our first encounter Danny? The fans cheering my name. All of them wanting me to be their hero. Then I had to make a hard choice. I knew this “Gamble” is nothing more than an idiot who knows nothing about our business. So I did what had to be done. I did what was needed to save CWF. I did what was the best thing for this company!
And I have no regrets other than I wished it would have been you versus Jace, but that was out of my hands. Someone had to get injured. I knew Angelica and Cain couldn't keep this company going because Gamble wouldn't listen to them. Someone who hates the man that Gamble hates the most however...
That's where you and Blue were suppose to come in.
It's all been a part of the plan. My plan has been a slow and methodical one because everyone is watching and waiting to see you get your revenge with your new purpose. Oh, sure you want the title. We all know that Danny. You are “The Ripper” after all...if you can't have the spotlight well...who can?
I've had it ever since I walked in here and you can't stand it. Put up or shut up Ripper.
Looks like I will just have to break your leg again. AHAHAHAHAHAhahahahaha...
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{We fade in on a arena with shadowy figures cheering. Suddenly...}
If you smell….what the Ripper….is cooking….
{The lights come on and we see the figures are all shadowy cardboard cut outs .The Ataxia steps out onto the stage for the first time, a round of tremendous applause greats the commissioner. We see a stage hand cut off the soundboard of the crowd cheering. “The Ataxia” is wearing a complete rip of Danny's outfit and even a latex Danny B mask over his own face. It looks like a Silence of the Lambs skin mask. “The Ataxia” takes in his fans, before storming towards the ring, he climbs the steps, climbing on to the second rope and throwing his hands up in the air in his traditional devil horns salute. The stage and ramp explodes in a colourful array of fireworks. “The Ataxia” jumps over the top rope, and trips in the ring.}
“The Ataxia: Can you tell who the hell I'm ripping off? Dunn Doo Dunn Dunn Booww wooowww wooow. The lawyers...The lawyers say...we're gonna get sued. You know what. This.
{He gestures to this ridiculous outfit and this face.}
“The Ataxia”: How can you not fall over with this ugly ass chin leading the way. I think you need to get some work done. This face. No wonder you're so emo. Hell if I had these ugly teeth and crooked ass face I would hate everyone and blame them for my problems to. No wonder, you have to buy big expensive cars. The pants size that your in is so tight I can tell your package is lacking hence why you have such a expensive big car.
{“The Ataxia” does a spin around move.}
“The Ataxia”: BOOM SHAKALACKA! Heyyy. You know what you guys would like. How about I give you guys a awesome match tonight. Pay per view quality. For free! Isn't that awesome? Yeah! Cause I'm awesome! High five!...God this parody sucks! Then again...look who I am imitating! Seriously, how can I make this even remotely funny?
{Cheap lightning effects happen behind “The Taxia”. He turns slowly to see a big fat man, clothed only in tattered leather pants. He spoke, his voice echoing around the church as if it was digitally transferred...because it is. The big zit faced glasses wearing fat man wheezes for a moment and sighs.}
A-N00B-IZ: I am the dark lord A-N00B-IZ! Come my fellow Devil of Doom! We shall rule! Have you seen my son?
{We see a seven foot tall skinny black man standing to the side. “The Ataxia” looks really confused.}
“The Ataxia”: Wait..a nerd like you actually had sex? Someone actually touched your wannabe Dungeon Master ass?
A-N00B-IZ: Hey at least this better than your first parody idea...
{“The Ataxia” looks off into the distance and we see a man dressed in a Victorian outfit with a top hat and cloak. The guy looks like a hobo from outside.}
Dan “The Wanker” E: I have always been, and I will always be...a public MASTERBATOR!!
{“The Wanker” starts making fap fap noises and we cut back to “The Ataxia”.}
“The Ataxia”: I think I might have went a bit to far...
A-N00B-IZ: You think? What about you D-Herc?
D-Herc (The tall black guy): Yeah pops!
“The Ataxia”:...I can still save this promo. To the Lamemobile!
{The theme from the Batman 1960's television show kicks off and “The Ataxia” leaps out of the ring and lands into a 1970 AMC Gremlin!}
“The Ataxia”: (In a proper British accent) The Gremlin debuted in April 1970 with AMC's 199 cu in (3.3L) I6 (a very sturdy and durable seven main bearing design), which produced 128 hp (95 kW) as standard equipment, with AMC's 232 cu in (3.8 L) I6 - producing 145 hp (108 kW) - as an option. The low-priced Gremlin offered "the best gas mileage of any production car made in America," with its standard conventional features, but it also had "an unusually long option list for the era" so owners could have luxury and conveniences typically found in more expensive cars, and these options "came with a much higher profit margin" for the automaker. Sales for the abbreviated model year were 25,300. I can get car facts from wikipedia so I can sound like I know what the fuck I rented for a god damn promo to ya limey wannabe American little dick sucking bitch!
{With that A-N00B-IZ and D-Herc start to push it off as “The Ataxia” makes “Bun Bun Noises”. They stop in front of a poster of Disney's Repunzel. “The Ataxia” gets a great idea, because a CGI lightbulb kicks on and He screams!}
“The Ataxia”: Guys I just thought of a great match never done before in CWF! We'll throw someone off the top of a four story cage!
A-N00B-IZ: They've done that...A lot.
D-Herc: Yeah!
“The Ataxia”:...Fuck you two jobbers! I'm a genius. I'm the main character that guest stars in your shit to make you seem fucking important. Fade this shit out. I'm done.
A-N00B-IZ: Aint you gotta beat up two kids for no damn reason even though you're “the hero”?
“The Ataxia: Know your role and be a mute ya rooty tooty fresh and fruity, anal eating, fart ripping, ugly ass, fat chick thriller, serial rapist wannabe, pedobear costume wearing furry sicko! IFFFFFFF YAAAAAA KNOOWWWWW....What the hell...I'm doing...Tell me!
{“The Ripper's” theme song plays as “The Ataxia” flips off the camera with one hand and picks “Danny B's” nose to get a booger.}
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Karma.
That's a funny concept. You bring up what goes around and coming around. I know I got a lot of bad shit coming my way Danny. I know that I am going to get pay back. I know that I am going to be hurt for all the good I have been doing. That's right. Good that we are on the same page. Because everything I have fucking has been to save this place! You! Aside from what I have manipulated you into doing Danny you haven't done JACK...FUCKING...SHIT!!!
You say I am a spotlight whore?
I've stayed out of the spotlight. I could have taken out Jace and got my shot at Blue and then took the world title if that was what I was after. I'm not a selfish gloryhound like you or Jace are!. I. Care. About. This. Company.
The only way to save it was to make someone the center of attention even if he didn't want to be.
That person had to be me because no one else would do it. To afraid of their job or reputation being on the line. Their legacy. What legacy do I have Danny? What legacy did I really have to lose if I did the things I have done since then?
Nothing. Ataxia doesn't matter. Nothing matters.
All that matters is someone is now in charge that we can all get behind. That was the whole idea. Looking back considering how crazy Blue was I am actually glad it was you I had to screw over. Because despite what you think of me I know you to be one of the most fair men in this business. You have a level head and won't take crap from anyone.
Yes, I'm complimenting you ya fucking retarded welsh fisherman!
I find it funny you are getting advice from someone who I also put out of CWF. Whose back only because you need a fucking stooge corporate man!
I guess you will “never leading his side ” right? Must a Brit slash Redneck thing to butcher the language! Oh did I just pull a Marcus Delamere? Nah. I actually earn stuff. Instead of just make shit happen! You could have done the right thing here and just faced me but no. No. You call me a coward?! Look at you!
Oh I'm hurt I gotta hide behind my booking power.
Do yourself a favor and stop fucking up. You are sounding more retarded than the idea that Australians can make a International stable.
Oh you have nothing to prove? You have nothing to prove?! BULLSHIT! You have everything to prove. You fuck this up and you're a laughing stock. You are the next Weapon X!
So I can expect a no show at the next pay per view from you to.
I can't be beaten because either way I get what I want. No matter what I got a win. You win, Gamble goes down and so does this place my way. If I win...I get to show you how to do your fucking job.
I think I'm going to like crippling you yet again. I think I will enjoy hurting you by not only breaking you physically...I'm going to enjoy breaking your character.
This time there will be no dress.
You're still my fucking bitch.
Get ready to Die Darling!
The Messiah Pariah...is gonna send you high and crash you down.
And all you will hear as you go down...
Ahaha...
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...
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