"...And I don't even caaarrreee!!!" Hip to be a Square. Huey Lewis and The News.

Apparently we are experiencing technical difficulties so let me catch you up on exactly what happened!

RW: The match is over! And...WHOA!

JC: Jesus Christ!

The Axis of Ultra Violence members and Ataxia charge into the ring from their positions on the outside and start beating the shit out of Ace and Redd. Nirvana gets helped up by Henchwoman as Dawn and Dirk double team Ace with a double snap suplex. Ace starts to roll out of the ring after he gets stomped on by the Axis members. Redd gets up to look around and see...Hellion Jr., Hardcore Hect, and Ataxia standing right next to him. TRIPLE SUPERKICK TO THE FACE! Ataxia leaps onto Redd before he even hits the mat and slams a elbow into Redd's sternum! Hect calls for a microphone. He tosses it to Nirvana who runs over and kicks Redd right in the side of the head. Each member of the Axis takes turns kicking and punching Redd as Ataxia goes to the outside and grabs a black gymbag from underneath the ring.

RW: This is a pure one hundred percent beatdown by the Axis!

JC: Why the hell aren't they beating up Ataxia to! I thought they hated each other.

RW: The enemy of the guy who cost me my shot at the title are my temporary allies?

Nirvana:...Have I got your attention yet? Has it dawned on you that no matter what happened here tonight I am still the best damn wrestler in this federation? Has it gotten into your feeble little brain that we are un-FUCKING-stoppable! We are the Axis of Ultra Violence and...

SFT security starts to runs out to try and break this up and Hellion Jr. runs to the ropes. He leaps to the top rope and springboards off doing a massive splash to take down the security guards. Hect grabs the mic from Nirvana as Nirvana picks up Redd and flips him off before hitting the “Embrace Nirvana”!

RW: Security just got taken down by Hellion Jr!

JC: Somebody had better help Redd out or I think his career is going to be over!

RW: The Axis is making a statement tonight!

Dirk Roman smiles after Nirvana gets down and rushes at Redd. “The Elbow of Despair”! Dawn gets in on the act and heads to the closest turnbuckle. “Apocalypse Omega”! The fans are divided. Some cheering and some booing the actions of the Axis of Ultra Violence. Redd is still trying to fight by getting to his knee's but Henchwoman and Hellion Jr. hit him with a double elbow drop. Hardcore Hect gets down in Redd's face while he is on the mat.

Hardcore Hect: You really have earned our attention Redd! So much so that we decided to have a meeting. A “WE HATE REDD” meeting. Surprise of all surprises! There was someone who wasn't one of us at that meeting. Well we couldn't have that...Let me introduce someone to you...I think you know each other but...TAX!

Ataxia gets back in the ring and opens the gym bag. He tosses Hect a barbwire baseball bat. Hect smiles as he slams it into side of Redd's face! More SFT security shows up as Ataxia grabs the discarded microphone.

Ataxia: STAY THE FUCK WHERE YOU ARE!! If anyone comes down to this ring I swear to God I will kill him! I will fucking kill this man on live television. Stay the fuck on the ramp.

RW:...Whoa. This just got really serious.

JC: Ataxia is threatening to kill Redd? Oh boy. Here comes some lawsuits.

Ataxia grabs Redd by the throat and pulls him up with one hand. Redd struggles, but after the amount of abuse he's had he can't really do much.

Ataxia: I told you I'd make you infamous...

Redd spits in Ataxia's face! Ataxia smiles as Redd kicks Ataxia in the shin trying to fight back but he gets overpowered by Hardcore Hect hitting Redd in the back with the barbewire baseball bat. Nirvana runs up and throat punches Redd. Ataxia reaches into the bag and pulls out a two pairs of handcuffs. He drags Redd over to a ring corner and handcuffs his left hand to the bottom ropes with one pair and his right one with the other bottom ropes. Redd literally can't leave the ring now. Ataxia takes out a pink sparkly ball gag and puts it on Redd's mouth.

Ataxia: Now...let's talk. A few weeks ago you decide to interfere in my life. You got me here in SFT. A place I'm starting to really really not like. People like you run rampant. People sticking their nose where it doesn't belong. If you hadn't done it Redd...this wouldn't have happened. As of right now I got two announcements...One...I am the newest member of the Axis of Ultra Violence!

Some of the diehard fans of the stable cheer while most of the fans are booing these actions. Redd is screaming at Ataxia. Ataxia licks his black opera glove and bitchslaps Redd across the face. The look of pure rage on Redd's face says it all.

Ataxia: Shut up when a real man is talking. You see...I joined...for one reason. This is the best way to kill this place and you. I don't have to kill you Redd to make my point. I do have to kill “Redd” though...The another announcement...someone is going to burn tonight.

Ataxia grabs the black gymbag and pulls out a jar of a light red looking gel. He starts smearing it on Redd's face.

RW: What the hell is that...

JC: I smell...gas...

Ataxia: This shit right here...is pyrogel. Your all ready feeling the effect Redd. Your face is going to get really cold to keep the flames from burning you. That's the point. Stuntmen use this to set themselves on fire and not get burned for a few minutes. So I'm going to keep you burning longer than a few minutes. Each second is going to be like pure agony before you find out just how long you have before it's extra crispy time. You've earned something very few people get Redd...so I'm going to show you who I really am!

Ataxia rips off his mask to reveal...Redd's face! The latex and makeup make it look like Ataxia's “face” is really Redd's down to the slight details that only a close up could tell. The only real difference between them is Ataxia's red eyes and red teeth. Redd is screaming as the rest of the Axis are even a little shocked at this.

Ataxia: My name is Redd...this is not my story...

RW: He...sounds just like Redd!

JC: What the hell is going on here!

Ataxia: I'm a expert mimic boy...That's right. This is your voice telling you this. This is your voice telling you that you have really screwed up your life. This is not what you should be doing. You should run away. This is what you really look like to everyone. A red eyed demon that no one will ever love or care about. That's what you want. You want to be left alone. You want to unknown...the problem is tonight I said someone would burn. That someone is you...Redd.

Ataxia holds out the gloved hand that he smeared the gel on Redd's face. Nirvana reaches into the bag and pulls out a grill lighter. He lights Ataxia's hand on fire as the gel starts to burn. Ataxia smiles as he puts the mic up to his lips.

Ataxia: Get him up...I want him standing for this.

Nirvana and Hardcore Hect uncuff Redd from the turnbuckle and hold him up. The rest of the Axis are either laughing or are marveling at what they are about to see.

Ataxia: Get ready for our effigy to the entire locker room...

Ataxia holds up his flaming hand...and touches the his own latexed face. It lights up fast. So fast that it already starts to melt a bit. Redd tries to look away from the face burning in front of him but Hect and Nirvana keep his eyes opened.

RW: This is...disturbing.

JC: ...

Ataxia: I am Redd...This is not my story! I AM REDD!!! I AM REDD!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA...Howse about a kiss?

Redd screams are muffled by the ball gag as the flaming Ataxia moves in close then...darts out the way as Glitter from Dirk Roman hits Redd in the face blinding him. The Axis hoists up Redd and tosses him out towards SFT security. They all surround Ataxia as he rips off the flaming face of Redd and gets his mask put back on without anyone seeing his real face. He throws the flaming mask of Redd right in front of where the man landed. Nirvana picks up the mic as his stable stands behind him.

Nirvana: We are the Axis of Ultra Violence...We just changed the world!

RW: Shadow's not gonna stand for this!

JC: Who else does he have to throw at them? There is no force in SFT that can match The Axis of Ultra Violence!

RW: I don't know how Redd's gonna be able to handle himself after all of that!

Now that we are all caught up. Let's talk about this week. Apparently the front office has decided to finally give me the opportunity to get my shot at the world title. Hm. Maybe they are afraid of what is going to happen if they piss me off again. Setting someone's face on fire, even symbolically, seems to have garnered me some sort of reputation.

Aint that just dandy.

Now one could look at this as payback. One could also look at this as a attempt to break up the powerbase of the Axis. Not going to happen. WHEN I win this match. When...I win this match. There will be no break up. No Axis B-Team. No Axis Wolfpack! No Axis Hollywood...maybe an Axis Bollywood but that depends on just how much they offer us for that part in the latest Bollywood musical coming soon to a theatre near you. “Cal-CUT-A!”.

Hahahaha...

Had to. Sorry. I think I just made someone spew out their drink through their nose.

See. Whatever the reason. It doesn't matter. The main reason why I showed what SFT didn't during the show was for one reason.

I wanted the future fanboy sitting on his ass at home to realize just what's in store for him.

See that. That's ratings! Know what that means? I'm a hot ticket. Guess what that means? They want me to do something just as violent to someone else. Guess whose on the list!

Oh I am sure you will “attack” me. Hell you might even try to unmask me. Go ahead. Because there is one thing and one thing only that is going to happen if you do that.

I want you to take a look at your accolades. I want you to look at everything that has made you special.

When I signed my contract I made it a point to have SFT officials sign one thing. If I became unmasked without it being put on the line in a match. If that happened. The person who violates that rule. The person who tries that. Loses everything. Is liable for damages. Since a lot of money has been placed into this mask I am allowed to be re-compensated.

Which means I take everything that made you, however pathetic it is, from you.

Then again it might be an improvement. Regardless. This match is going to be interesting.

Two on one is a possibility, but I doubt it. You two don't like each other much really from what I can tell. That suits me just fine.

First off, he who doesn't deserve a name.

Now I could come at you like everyone else has over the years. I could make fun of sooooo many things, but that wouldn't get me anywhere. See. I know you better than you know yourself.

You've already got a slew of things to say in response.

This is why you haven't said anything yet.

This is why you aren't going to say anything till I do aren't you?

It's fine. No one really wants to hear what you have to say either way. “I wanted my title shot so ummm...I attacked you.”

Whopdee crap.

Someone didn't get what they wanted so you decided to stick your nose in my business? Now if there is some long standing reason why you give a flying fuck about the National Title then please do enlighten me. Because to put it point blank and period I think your just full of yourself.

Which is fine.

If I had easy competition like this all these years I could have a list of accomplishments that no one gives a fuck about as well.

So go ahead. Enlighten me about all of your bullshit. Please. Please. I want to hear more about you, yourself, and your ego. Please. I'm just waiting to hear pargraph of pride about your post powerful prose.

I want you to lay it on as thick the fat chicks in the buffet line.

Because, let's face facts.

So far...I've proven my point about what I aim to do here in SFT.

“Your just Nirvana's boy!”

...Yeah. Sure.

Keep telling yourself that. Please. Keep doubting me. Keep making the jokes.

I can't wait to see how you can attempt to insult me. See the key difference between all of you and I is so clear that I'm surprised it hasn't dawned on you yet.

You don't know dick about me.

See, the rest of you love this pseudo-reality show promo style that seems to be popular. Where you all talk about your...(gags)...lives...outside of the ring.

Tell me. Aside from my conversations with my mentor...have you ever seen Ataxia at Starbucks with the kids?

No. And you never will.

I'm not here to be a wannabe celebrity who will only make really bad movies for the rest of his life once the fans realize how much he sucks. No. When this mask comes off back home...I do not live this life.

Which is why you will never see it.

It doesn't belong to you. It is none of the “fans” business.

“Oh your just embarrassed”.

No...No bitch. I don't want my family to know just what kind of psychopath they have wrought into this world. You see. I'm like Patrick Bateman in a way. I'm “Hip to be square”. I'm not some kind of happy go lucky guy all the time. I got to cut loose. I've got to...make something beautiful with violence.

Now...this allows me to take out my frustrations.

We all do this for some reason. You for the fame and the glory. Me. I do it because if I don't...

I'll kill every fucking one of you lame ass little fucking bitches.

Howse that for PC?

Everyone seems to think they have me figured out. Hell, you probably have a plan for this to.

Let me give you some advice I know you will not take.

Don't expect what you think is going to happen and only prepare about thirty percent for what you would never expect to happen.

I'm not unpredictable.

I'm just really good at adapting.

Oh, I'll lose.

I have no problem admitting it. Will I lose because you are the better wrestler?

No.

Will I lose because you are a opportunistic shit?

Probably. Don't really care.

See...I'm not in this for the world title.

I never was. I came here to do a job and that changed.

Sure. I will face Nirvana and give him a great match. Will I beat him? Maybe. That's not the point of this. The point of this is to take what you seem to think you have earned. A title shot. Wow. I got one of those sometime and someone made sure I didn't win it.

I'd hate for that to come back and bite me in the ass.

Like that guy's goal is just going to be to make sure that he would never let me earn that title shot? Some new hot thing that is so on fire right now he makes the sun look like a campfire.

That would really suck wouldn't it? That would suck if that epic superstar didn't give fuck about his career and just decided to end mine.

Now granted this shot isn't the one that you beat me up to make a point about it.

However...it's just so much sweeter.

Stick to tag teams. Someone needs to help you carry that fucking unearned ego of yours.

“I beat Alexander Hayes...”. Wonderful. Get a cookie.

Have you ever beat Ataxia? No. So go ahead and tell the world why you should have this match. Because I know the truth. The truth is simple.

They were going to have it be just a rematch with you and Hayes. Then they got the ratings back...

You guys had the worst interest points in the whole pay per view. Where as I...even “losing”...Got almost as much attention as the main event.

Oh sure. Corporate will tell you I'm lying. Then again, maybe they're lying to you. Doesn't matter. This match is just to prove that someone should face Nirvana after he beats that wannabe.

So our choices are you, a soon to be retired fanboy, Alexander Hayes...or me?

Damn.

It's really a no brainer who the fans want to win. The guy in the mask. Because the thought of either of you giving another promo makes their ears bleed!

Now let's get off of you for a moment because we all know the only one who gets on you is what comes after your left hand is done.

Alexander Hayes!

Ohhh...I have wanted this match since I came into this federation. I have had you scouted for the longest time for such a epic amount of pure grade A...talent.

This is going to be a good match.

You versus...fanboy.

That was a good match.

With me. I'm going to make this a great match. See, you have to help me though. You have to provide me with something I can work with because...well look what else we have to work with.

Someone who makes Steve Urkel look cool.

Anywho. I need you to do something for me. It's something very important. See the fans want...no...need a great main event. I'm going to give them that and you are going to provide that.

Now you may be asking. “Taxy...what can I do to help?”

Glad you asked. What you can do to help Hayes.

Is so simple even you can't fuck it up.

So this has no pressure...unlike the last pay per view when you...ugh...I can't even go into that.

No. What I need you to do is quite simple.

Get pissed.

I want you all fired up! The question is...how can I help you help yourself do that?

I could do the obvious thing. I could talk about your brother.

I'm not though. Seriously. Besides you probably got fifty or so insults for that. No. Not going to get you any sympathy. Mainly because I understand that it's a really sore spot for you.

Not the sorest spot though.

Hmm. Where to poke and prod.

“Why do you want Hayes mad Ataxia?”

Simple. He's not stupid like opponent number one.

So I need to get him in a state that I can control.

“You just told him your strategy! Isn't that going to ruin your plan?”

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

I'm like a Troll on a forum kids. I'll get him eventually.

Besides it's so much more...satisfying when the opponent see's the train coming. Then just can't get out of the way.

Question though. Does it bother you that one of your finishers is just one of my regular moves?

I have to ask this.

Because it really interests me. It's kinda like that guy who does a DDT as a regular move. When he goes up against a guy who uses the DDT as his finisher. The exact same DDT as him. How is it different? Does someone know some secret way to do the hold different or are they just doing it wrong? I dunno. We're of course talking about the four fifty splash.

No worries though...I won't steal your thunder with it.

Just watch your neck. I got a nasty habit of slamming them into turnbuckle posts.

Now why am I being nicer to you than the six time! Six Time! SIXXXX TIIMMMMMMAMAMAMAMAMAMEEEEEEE World Heavyweight Champion.

Because your hungry for that title. You want it more! You need it more!

What does he need it for? To make himself another title reign to feel good about himself. What do you need it for? To prove you belong? To prove that you have earned everything! To prove that you are the best of the best once again.

You don't need a belt to do that Alex.

You don't need this match.

Somewhere. Something is tormenting you to do this. It's a voice in the back of your head that says “I have to win.”

I know that voice.

It's still and small until it needs to be as loud as a sea full of lighters.

It drowns out the crowd. It makes you focus! It makes you a winner.

I'm going to take that voice.

...and choke it to death right in front of you.

You will hear it.

“Win.Win.Win.”

Douchebag wil hear his.

“Awesome! I'm Awesome!”

Then there is me...what voice will I have in my head?

None.

It's quiet in here.

Probably because I killed everyone all ready.

See...I know something about you. Doo Dah. Doo Dah. I know something that is gonna screw you over...

Oh...De...Do...Dah...Day!

Just remember kids...I don't even care.

This world title match means nothing to me.

If I beat Nirv for it. It stays in the Axis.

And under my coffee table to keep it balanced.

This means nothing to me.

It does mean everything to both of you.

Let the fun times begin...AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

{We fade in on Ataxia sitting outside in the darkness of a desert. He sits atop of a mesa as the stars light up the night sky.}

Ataxia: When you wish upon a star. Makes no difference who you are...Anything your heart desires will come to you.

{Ataxia holds something up to his mouth. It looks like a red apple.}

Ataxia: What were you expecting? A heart? How low do you people think I will stoop for a cheap gag. So why am I here? Why am I not on the tour. Had a “family emergency”. In reality I just needed to get away for a bit. I'll be back on the road. Doing what I do best. Oh speaking of which. I got something here that I think everyone is going to enjoy.

{Ataxia holds up two folders. One says Douchebag and the other says Alexander Hayes.}

Ataxia: Never underestimate the power of people who like getting paid in cash. I got presents early this year. Sure. I've watched your matches. Learned everything about those I needed to so I did a little digging! Actually a lot of digging.

{Ataxia looks at his suit jacket and brushes off some dust. He eyes move up and down for a moment and then he winks at the camera.}

Ataxia: What do I have planned for you? Maybe...I could just do a promo like both of you since words gotten out about my mimicry. Then...I'd just be repeating myself. Kind of like your promos. Instead...I'm doing something just oohhhhhh sooooo special for both of you. I want you to look into your real faces without me putting them on. Besides if I wanted to look like Douchebag I guess I'd have to walk on my hands to be accurate and try to stick my own face up my butt. I could do something really racist with Hayes...but I'm not. No. See. I'm controversial...not cheaply offensive. I hope you both like the promo. It was a bitch getting that footage from the show, but I have my ways. Now the only question left kids is this...

{The camera zooms in on Ataxia's face stopping on his mouth. He smile, exposing those blood red misshaped teeth of his.}

Ataxia: Are you ready for this...AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

{Fade to gray...}