The screen starts to come to life as we fade in on a "creature feature" looking set. Cheap dollar store "spider webbing" adorns everything. This thing is a "Munsters" ripoff if their ever was one. The color scheme is black and white as we turn around the wooden decrepit looking set. We see a raven look at us. It's eyes are red as it caws at us. We see candles are what light this place. Flickering in and out. We pan down the hallway and we see coffins line the walls. Finally we see a throne made out of black coffins. Sitting upon the throne in a more grand tuxedo is Ataxia. In his gloved hands are a black skull adorned top hat and a cane with a inverted cross at the top.

Ataxia: I grow bored of this.

He stands up and the film statics out. He is now right in front of us with a extreme closeup of his eye. It's red iris, a stark contrast, to the black and white reality.

Ataxia: Hell T.V. Land.

The film static's again and now we see Ataxia laying in a coffin smiling at the camera. He leans up.

Ataxia: You think you know me right? You think that all of this theatricality is some new thing I'm doing. Maybe make myself out to be some sort of off beat sympathetic figure. God you people are really retarded.

Static again as Ataxia is now standing next to a skeleton stroking it's skull.

Ataxia: This is not meant to be anything more than my own amusement. This match is a joke. You don't think I don't know what's going to happen all ready. Last match of the night against a hack you want to look competent? Oh SFT. I see the beatdown from the UVA and DI coming towards me like a girl during a money shot. I'm not going to take this to the eyes. You want to hurt me? You want to break me?

Static again as Ataxia has the raven on his head. He looks up at it as he talks.

Ataxia: You aint got the ability. None of you do. Hell if Nirv, Dawn, Dirk, or Henchwoman decided to turn on me they wouldn't be able to stop me either. You want to call me a clone? You want to waste your time trying to make some sort of lame promo against me to try and intimidate me? Ask yourself. How can you really intimidate me with the lackluster attempts at promos like this? What? You going to insult me to death? Hell, I would take that compared to watching this drivel. Stick to commentating. Bad puns and making JC look good is your only fucking function you fucking little pile of eighth grade fart jokes.

Ataxia is in a bright red dress instead of a suit now. Ataxia: What is the point? D.I. is no threat to me. UVA is no threat to me. None of you are a fucking threat to me! This is a pointless match that serves no purpose. No one else see's this. So you know what. I'm going to show you all how to do your damn jobs since no one else apparently can. Someone like you made it into the Hall of Fame here? Wow. I am so glad I will never make it into the Hall of Fame of Losers. Get ready to get your butt kicked.

Static. Coffin labeled Legend. Fade to Black.

So...what's the point of this?

Oh "stable war". Pardon me while I snore.

You honestly think that your little group is anything for me to worry about? You got Gary Mac. You got Miranda, not the one I'm currently hooked up with. You got Ace...whatever. Then we have you. Wow. I'm really not seeing a connection here. You all just ganging up on my team because sales of your merchandise is down? This has to be for money or ego because honestly I don't see the point of you doing this.

After all you got a nice easy job running your mouth.

Why give that up for this? Did the “retired” star thing get to annoying? Did the horrible lack of doing anything substantial finally kick you in the face?

Divine Intervention. Heh. Guess that was what Josh needed and didn't get right?

I love that every loser seems to think that ganging up on us is going to beat us. Really Legend? Is that the best your color commentating mind could come up with. Oh and your "choice" of partners are quite interesting. Tell me. Did it really bother Miranda that much that we were getting so much attention without her even being in the picture? Did Gary Mac and Ace realize that no one was remembering them so they should come out of retirement to take us on? What finally got you?

My indifference?

My philosophy?

My lack of giving a fuck about this pile of shit glorified indy fed?

Which was it?

What drives you to get up off of your pathetic slacker ass now?

What makes you so afraid of us?

Because that is all this is. It's fear. It's so simple no matter how you cut it. Gary Mac confronts his fears by saying "I've beaten everyone of you", but I laugh at that because I'm still here.

He's never "beaten" me because I can't be beaten. You are all so near sighted and closed minded. Take a step back and look at the big picture if it's possible for you to do so. I don't think it is. You sit there. Week after week after week watching it. You want to be in that ring Legend. That's all it is.

So you get one match with another wannabe and now you get to take me on in the main event.

Go back to the table where you belong.

Because I am going to enjoy obliterating you. You know how much of a treat this is! Do you know how awesome this is! I get to beat up the man who has been talking shit and has got no fucking repercussions.

I am going to try and not enjoy this to much.

I feel this is one resolution I will not break.

You don't seem to know how stupid you are. For months you have watched what I have done in the ring night after night. You have seen me win and lose and think you have some sort of understanding. Let me explain this to you. In that ring. You don't know dick. I am going to rip you apart. I am going to break you. If I have my way. You will never commentate again.

I will break your jaw.

No. No. I won't do it.

I've got something far worse than you. I'm not going to break you. I'm not going to end you. I'm going to replace you.

That's right kids. New commentator is coming to SFT.

I'm going to find the best man to handle your job. That way when you get beat up. When you lose. No where to run to baby. No where to hide.

You are going to have to face the fact that you are finished. You are going to be the first casualty of this war. Because I may lose this match. I will still win. I will still defeat all of you because I know something you don't know.

I know what I'm capable of. Do you?

Bow Down Choke Artist!